Q: Is Gov. Ted Strickland the greatest thing to happen to Ohio since Devo?

A: Yes. Not counting T.A.M.S.Y., obvs.

PLAIN DEALER: Ohio could become 8th state to reject abstinence-only money

Ohio might become the eighth state to reject federal money for abstinence-only sex education — a decision that public-policy groups say is part of a nationwide shift toward more-comprehensive sex-ed programs.

Gov. Ted Strickland last week proposed phasing out federal grants for abstinence-only instruction, following the lead of governors in California, Connecticut, Maine, Montana, New Jersey, Rhode Island and Wisconsin. [Wait, Montana? Really? Montana? I mean, good for you, Montana, but — really? Montana? Like Montana Montana? Really? -- t.a.m.s.y.]

"The abstinence-only approach has seen its day, and the support's really waning," said Bill Smith, vice president for public policy at the Sexuality Information and Education Council of the United States in Washington, D.C.

Incidentally, "I'm vice president for public policy at the Sexuality Information and Education Council, and baby, the abstinence-only approach has seen its day," is a pick-up line I've been using since the late '80s.

Anyway, three cheers for Ohio joining the few states with the cajones to acknowledge that it's foolish (not to mention anti-democratic) to base any curriculum on a policy of suppressing information. I don't know how you did things back in Soviet Russia, but this is America, baby.

The fact remains: No matter how tightly you clamp shut your eyes, how deeply into your ears you dig your fingers, or how loudly or longly you croon "Michael, Row the Boat Ashore," ignoring human nature isn't going to make it disappear. I'm sorry if you find that depressing. But deal with it already.

Devo
Uncontrollable Urge
Q: Are We Not Men? A: We Are Devo!, 1978

(Incidentally, "I don't know how you did things back in Soviet Russia, but this is America, baby," is a pick-up line I've been using since the late '80s.)

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OH, AND ABOUT MONTANA: I almost forgot that Montana's Gov. Brian Schweitzer, is one of them CUH-RAZY politicians who bases his opinions on facts rather than pandering. He's also, surprisingly, a Democrat — elected to govern a conservative state whose voters had grown weary of Republican ineptitude. In other words, his stance on sex ed isn't the only thing he has in common with Strickland.

EARLIER: Is Ted Strickland secretly into musical theater?