A: Then you may very well have trouble enjoying this goofy British video, by Dan le Sac vs Scroobius Pip, in which the duo establishes the genre of grime-novelty (hereafter grovelty). The song: "Thou Shalt Always Kill".
I particularly agree with them vis-à-vis music and poetry, tragedies that occur in non-English-speaking countries, and Radiohead. [via Kevin]
A: Something unexpected happened between President George W. Bush and Queen Elizabeth II on the South Lawn of the White House yesterday. Whether it was LOL hilarious or a horrible disgrace depends on whom you ask, the American press or the British press. Oh, wait, President Bush was involved, so it was probably both.
The video record of the moment in question is indeed ambiguous, particularly vis a vis the Queen's bemusement and/or blood-curdling rage:
So how can we find out what really happened? Only one way: He Said, She Said — Yanks vs. Brits Edition — to determine once and for all which nation's reporters are slightly less incompetent!
We say tomato; they say tomahhto; let's fight it out to the death!!!
THE CHALLENGERS
Representing the red, white and blue, it's Bush's hometown Houston Chronicle, running a syndicated piece from the right-leaning Chicago Tribune. Representing the other configuration of red, white and blue, it's the London-based Daily Mail, taking a brief break from reporting on what Robbie Williams was wearing yesterday or whatever. And we're off!
WHAT HAPPENED?
HOUSTON: "The queen, a sprightly 81, gave an embarrassed Bush a gracious nod after he suggested she had celebrated the United States' founding in 1776. He meant to say she had attended 1976 bicentennial festivities. 'You helped our nation celebrate its Bicentennial in 17 ... ' Bush said, quickly correcting himself, ' ... in 1976.'"
LONDON: "When you've just made it sound like the Queen is more than 200 years old, there may be a few ways of recovering from the gaffe. But turning to her and giving her a sly wink is probably not included in any book of royal etiquette... The Queen received the wink with a frosty glare."
HEADLINE?
HOUSTON: "Bush's verbal slip adds humor to queen's visit; Bush faux pas also manages to show how well the 2 nations get along."
LONDON: "Blundering Bush makes ANOTHER gaffe as he winks at the Queen"
CONTEXT?
HOUSTON: "The U.S. and United Kingdom share more than centuries of history. Queen Elizabeth II commemorated the 400th anniversary of the Jamestown Settlement in Virginia with this, her fifth visit to the U.S. and her first in 16 years. The erstwhile adversaries, their colonial ties severed by revolution, stand as the staunchest allies at war in Iraq and Afghanistan."
LONDON: "Mr Bush is the leader who once greeted Prime Minister Tony Blair with: 'Yo, Blair. How are you doing?'"
WINNER?
In the category of being delightfully entertaining, the Daily Mail is the clear winner — although it did have an unfair advantage, given that it is, like all British tabloids, extremely drunk.
In the category of being journalistically sound, the Chronicle wins simply by virtue of not blatantly lying. Regular T.A.M.S.Y. readers (by which I mean "all of the Western world") will know that it pains me to even sorta defend El Presidente, but just look at the Daily Mail's photographic retelling of Bush's verbal blunder.
Bush: Pissed in the U.K. sense. Queen: Pissed in the U.S. sense.
The Mail implies these two things happened in sequence. That only makes sense if the Queen was running laps around Bush — either in an effort to show how not 250 years old she is, or just as a tribute to Street Sense. Actually, I like that version of the story best. I encourage the Telegraph to cover it in the evening edition.
NOTE TO LAW ENFORCEMENT: The image at the top of this post is merely an artistic rendering of hypothetical events. It does not constitute a call for the president to be assassinated by the Queen, or anyone else. Please do not send me to Guantanamo. [image via Getty, via Sullivan]
"The devil didn't wear Prada, but Meryl Streep did..." [TIUK]
GOOD ONE!!!
Also oy-inducing:
If there was a unifying theme, it was the popularity of the winners — at least with the audience inside the Kodak Theatre in Hollywood. They roared with approval for Mirren, gave Scorsese his long-delayed ovation, and poured out so much love for Gore and... An Inconvenient Truth, it was a wonder the red carpet on Hollywood Boulevard didn't turn rainforest green.
Indeed. In summary, it was an Oscar ceremony in which all of the winners were applauded, and none of them booed. Also, nobody got stabbed.
A: They're not on Pitchfork, All Music, or Amazon yet, but Suki Brownies are worth a listen.
The Brownies formed in 2004 in Lyon, France, when guitarists/childhood pals Romu and Joe met Suki, a punky Brit chanteuse. Like the Coneheads, they come from France but talk English.
Check out "Papa," a bouncy, three-minute pop ode to childhood rebellion and messy bedrooms.
Très catchy -- and as with a lot of great pop songs, it's somehow familiar but new-sounding at the same time. I swear it could have been a big alt-rock radio hit in 1996, except it came out in 2006 (or possibly 2007 -- I can't locate a release date for the band's S/T debut, although it's available for purchase right now directly from the band). Can't you Clevelanders imagine hearing this on WENZ 107.9, back in the day?
For more on the band, visit their official site, or read the poorly translated biography on their MySpace. Their homepage says they're "currently in search of distributors, record companies, labels as well as gigs in order to promote the release of their first album." So if you happen to be any of those things, keep them in mind.
Killer Queen: Guaranteed to blow your mind.
Bush: Pissed in the U.K. sense. Queen: Pissed in the U.S. sense.
